Daily Prompt: Happily Ever After

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Ask most people what they want out of life and the answer is simple…to be happy. Maybe it’s this expectation though, the wanting to be happy, that just keeps us from ever getting there. Maybe the more we try and will ourselves to states of bliss, the more confused we get. To the point where we don’t recognize ourselves. Instead we just keep smiling, trying like hell to be happy people we wish we were.

I am very happy with my life. I am very happy with my journey till here as well. I have made mistakes, I have made bad decisions, I have had my downside but I am happy for it because that is what has got me to the state I am in at the moment. I used to constantly expect more from my life, I was never content with what I have ever. Every time I achieved something, the moment of happiness used to be short lived and time again think that I haven’t done much in my life. There is so much more to see, to know, to learn, to accomplish, how am I going to do all that? In the bargain I lost my happy moment lamenting over something yet to happen. Challenges definitely help me grow, become a better person, live a happier life. Only when I go ahead with a challenge do I realize the true motive of going through with it. And if I end up embracing a challenge for too long, not wanting to let go of the happy state. That’s when the happiness gets replaced by expectation and eventually remorse.

But now, I have realized that happiness is not in the number of challenges one takes or the tougher the challenges one is put through. Happiness is something that has been there all along, not in our dreams or hopes, but in the known, the comfortable, the familiar. Hence it is wrong to say, do what makes you happy. But instead say, live what keeps you happy.

 

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All that starts well, ends well.

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Life takes such different turns every day. Every day we go through different experiences and feelings; learn something new about ourselves. Every new day might not be special but there is something new and special in each day. It’s the first month of a brand new year, a first of many firsts. A first of many months to comes, many opportunities yet to explore, many experiences still to undergo and many more reasons to celebrate life. I don’t know if it’s a coincidence to experience so many firsts in the first month of the year, but it’s definitely a revelation of good things to come in the year ahead. Here is the list of some of the firsts that happened in January of the many yet to come this year:

1st January 2013: The first time I spent the first day of a new year with my entire family around. We have never been together on 1st January, someone or the other would always be missing from the picture. It was a day well spent since I didn’t sleep through the entire first day of the year. It’s been a sort of tradition for me to spend the 1st of January every year sleeping through the day. I  used to believe that if I slept on the first day of the year, I would get sound sleep all through the year. But this year for a change I ended up waking up early even after a heavy night the previous day (being new year’s eve). It was a pleasant change though,  since I spent the day with my entire family around for a change.

4th January 2013: The day I taught my first ever student. The first time I got to impart my knowledge and wisdom to someone. Even though I wasn’t the best teacher she could have found, but hope that the experience was as enriching for her as a student as it was for me as her teacher. To know more about my experience as a teacher for the first time, you could read my post Back & Forth.

11th January 2013: It was the first time that I posted a 1000 word post. I love to write, but generally never exceed 500 words or so. I think its a side effect of being a part of the advertising industry; when crafting or scripting an ad you always try and tell the story in as few a words as you can. The more concise your thought is, the more effective the ad is. My creative head always tells me to think of an ad that can be fit into six frames. I feel, if my post is crisp and to the point, it is more interesting to read. But with this post I didn’t realize, words were just flowing on it’s own. You can read the post here.

14th January 2013: The first time I realized the value of my boyfriend. That was the day we didn’t communicate with each other for the entire day, which generally never happens. But that day I ended up being so restless, I was unable to sleep properly at night. Even then my tiny little ego kept holding me back from messaging or calling him. That’s when it dawned upon me that I have always ignored the importance of his presence in my life. I am not a very expressive person and generally hesitate to tell the other person what I feel. My best form of expression would be through my writing. Maybe, it will be a first when I hopefully manage to tell him how I feel face to face (which even the thought of it scares me). You can read my first poem that I wrote for him here.

16th January 2013: It was by far the best day this year, the first time I gave a creative presentation as part of my job. I was so nervous the previous day, I couldn’t stop quivering. It’s not like I haven’t addressed a crowd or given presentations earlier, but whenever I have to present something in front of people I am not comfortable with I end up fumbling or talking very fast. Even though my seniors showed a lot of support, pushed me into doing it saying it was a great opportunity and most of all a great learning experience; they kept explaining to me how we had nothing to lose even if I messed up and they were going to be right there to back me up if I stumbled. Even then I was nervous as hell. But then it ended up being the best day, the feeling after giving the presentation well was one very exhilarating, and the fact that my script was the one to be approved of the many that were presented by numerous agencies was a feeling of being on top of the world. I couldn’t content my happiness that day with tears of happiness pouring down my cheek.    

17th January 2013: I went on my first client visit on this day. I had to go to an amusement park called Wonderla, meet the marketing manager and go around the place to get a feel of it. It was the first time I got bored in an amusement park (maybe because I didn’t end up going on any of the rides and stuff). Although it was an interesting experience to explore a theme park from a spectator’s point of view. Looking at the crowd enjoying, making observations and jotting down notes. It was an experience of a kind.

21st January 2013: The days you think are the big ones, they’re never as big as you make them out to be in your head. It’s the regular days, the ones that started out normal, those are the days that end up being the biggest. Today was the first time I stood up for what I believe in. Today was the day I stood up for the person I believe in. I never thought I could do it, to be strong, to be sure. Today I confronted the biggest decision of my life, confronting my parents about marrying the one person I truly love. Even though I am shit scared and nervous, but it feels right and I believe it is. I realized that you can never be sure until you take the first step, the hardest step. After which, it all seems worth it.

24th January 2013: It was a bright and sunny morning, the day of my first product photo shoot. I was expecting it to be really shady, low budget and boring experience. Since being a copywriter I assumed I wouldn’t have any work on the set and would spend the day staring at models posing for the perfect click. The moment I entered I thought I’ll cook up an excuse and leave by lunch time. But as I spent 10 minutes there, there was no going back. Turned out to be one the busiest and longest day I have had at work till date. It was a great shoot, the people were fun-loving and friendly, models were very nice to talk to (not their snobbish self), a pretty great learning experience and definitely was the perfect time to put my organisation skills to use. I am generally not a people’s person, but I was surprised at myself for talking so much to people I was meeting for the first time. Talking to the models, helped me get a first-hand world-view into the modelling industry as well. In the end it was a day well spent.

27th January 2013: Sometimes strangers seem closer than people you know. The first time I went for a wedding without an invite or knowing the bride or the groom. It was truly an exotic experience walking into a wedding with people you’ve known only for the last few hours yet still feel connected as though meeting long lost friends. I was extremely skeptical, felt a little weird to walk-in just like that, but once I got there it felt like I belonged there. The excitement of mingling with new people, experiencing new cultures, understanding different perspectives then striking a common ground. The entire experience was absolutely amazing. Sometimes it’s good to be around people you don’t know or rather who don’t know you, because you can be yourself; it’s like starting a story from scratch. We often seem to over look these opportunities that life gives us since we live in the fear of being judged constantly. Sometimes we need to let go and grab whatever life throws at us and make the best of it.

28th January 2013: There has never been an occasion where I don’t feel like putting down a call. At some point in time I do run out of things to say or feel tired and sleepy. But this was the first time when I didn’t feel like hanging up, even after 13 continuous hours of non-stop talking. It wasn’t like any other regular conversation I have, it   felt weird to have a connection with someone like this. Someone I never thought I would even get remotely close to feeling intellectually connected. There was something special that made me contradict my own norms of conversations. Things I found silly about phone calls, I suddenly felt like a victim of them and not find them silly after all. It felt like as though, if I ended the call I would never get to talk to him again. I just couldn’t let go. But it was a matter of just 4 hours till we started talking again.